Tell the Dear Fathers community more about who you are and what you do?
My name is Corey. I am a father of three, a grandfather of three (including a pair of fraternal twins and a granddaughter), and a father who experienced the loss of a son, Corey Jr., in 2013. I am a non-denominational pastor in PA, a bishop of a region, and a vice bishop of an organization, deemed disabled but still serving. I also run a men’s group on Facebook called Men of Standard: Our Forum.
In 2017, my wife Natassia and I co-founded Worldwide Empowerment Center after receiving a calling from God to create a ministry focused on faith, unity, community impact, and sharing Christ’s unconditional love. In my thirties, I was diagnosed with severe BPH, or enlarged prostate, and I dealt with that for 10 years until I decided to make a meaningful change that allowed me to stay engaged in my family and professional life; I had the UroLift in 2016 and never looked back.
What inspired you to become a pastor and community leader?
I used to work in finance and heard the call to serve. The calling was always there; I found myself in a place where I wanted to be part of the solution, not on the sidelines.
Tell us about your previous struggles with BPH? What signs/symptoms should men look for?
I started experiencing symptoms of BPH in my 30s, which is younger than many people expect. At first, it was frequent trips to the bathroom, especially at night. I was getting up multiple times every night, and it gradually started affecting every part of my life. Travel became stressful because I was constantly worried about finding a restroom. I even found myself drinking less water because I didn’t want to have to go as often, which isn’t healthy. I dealt with leakage, anxiety, interrupted sleep, and a constant concern about having an accident in public.
The biggest thing I’d tell men is to pay attention to the signs. Frequent urination, waking up several times during the night, weak flow, urgency, difficulty emptying your bladder, or leakage aren’t just things you have to live with. Talk to a doctor. The sooner you address it, the more options you may have.
Why is it important, for black men especially, to seek preventative care?
Too many men suffer in silence, and Black men are no exception. Sometimes we convince ourselves that a problem isn’t serious enough to address, or we just keep pushing through because that’s what we’ve always done. But your health affects every area of your life: your family, your work, your relationships, and your future.
Preventative care gives you information and options. If something doesn’t feel right, don’t ignore it. Getting checked early can help you avoid years of unnecessary struggles. I’ve learned that taking care of your health isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s your responsibility, especially when your family is depending on you.
You experienced something no parent wants to—losing a son in 2013. How did that experience impact your mental health and your thoughts on fatherhood moving forward?
It tried to break me, but my faith and belief in God carried me, my wife, and family. I had some struggles with mental anxiety, but was delivered from it because I did not want to speak about hope and healing and not have hope in me.
What advice do you have for any couple who has also experienced that loss?
The experience of losing a child is something that takes every bit of strength you have to hold on. It could break marriages or bring you closer. I say I had to understand as a father and husband that “yes, I am hurting, but my children and wife are hurting just as much.” I found strength in being a pillar, a tissue-getter, a shoulder to lean on, and a listening ear to my family and friends.
After that, you and your wife welcomed a son years later, despite being told you likely wouldn’t be able to have kids. What did that journey mean to you and your wife?
When we found out we were pregnant, we knew it was God’s doing because we were told by multiple doctors we had a 0.001 percent chance of having a child. In 2018, we had our 3rd son, John, and we have been feeling blessed and grateful for this blessing since. We miss our son, but we were grateful to have had the time we had with him and that we were chosen to be his parents.
Do you feel like addressing your BPH condition helped lead to the birth of your son?
I do. Before undergoing the UroLift procedure nearly 10 years ago, I had spent years dealing with BPH symptoms and trying different medications and treatments that either weren’t effective or came with side effects. At one point, my wife and I were told we likely wouldn’t be able to have more children.
After getting the UroLift procedure, everything changed. Within days, I noticed a dramatic improvement in my symptoms. I was sleeping through the night, traveling again, and living without the constant anxiety and limitations that BPH had placed on my life. Most importantly, I felt like myself again.
A few years later, in 2018, my wife and I welcomed our son. Given everything we’d been told and everything we’d been through, we truly see him as a blessing. While I can’t say exactly what would have happened otherwise, I do believe addressing my BPH and restoring my quality of life played an important role in making that chapter of our lives possible.
Who is Corey as a father today?
Today, I’m a father who values presence more than anything. When you’ve experienced both loss and second chances, you learn not to take time for granted. I have adult children and a young son, so I’ve had the opportunity to experience fatherhood in different seasons of life.
What does legacy mean to you?
Legacy means everything to me. I want to leave hope and love behind. When I have been laid to rest, I want my name and how I served people to be spoken of until my Lord and Savior returns. I want my children and grandchildren and their children to carry the legacy of serving God’s creation.
