Name: Olaolu Ogunyemi City: Stafford VA Instagram: @olaolu.ogunyemi
What does being a father mean to you?
Being a father means choosing simple moments to connect with your children, not waiting for the perfect “home run.” It means understanding that we’re riddled with mistakes, but our children love us for who we are and will grow into phenomenal people if we prioritize being present and engaged.
Describe your experience with your father growing up and how that impacted you today.
Bottom line: I could be in prison, or worse, if it weren’t for my father. Because of my own insecurities and struggles with identity, I just wanted to fit in. That caused me to hang with the wrong crowd and act out. However, my dad remained patient and loving. He spent time teaching me basic skills I still use today and guided me through the confusion associated with identity struggles. He never gave up on me, even when I made it easy for him to do so.
What things/tools/gems did you take from your experience growing up into your Fatherhood journey today?
I learned how to control what I can control and let everything else go. This is especially important for me as a career professional in the Marine Corps and an entrepreneur. I learned that people will always have an opinion, and some people will always have a disdain for you and your mission. However, my mom taught me that if you let people know what button to push to make you mad, they will push it every time. That helped me learn to control my reactions to people and circumstances I cannot control.
Have you had any obstacles on your fatherhood journey? If so, explain.
I graduated from college as a 22-year-old married man with a 3-year-old daughter. In addition to general cluelessness, I only knew how to clash, make up, and reset, just as I did with my brothers growing up. Having a girl was new territory for me, and I quickly learned that there were many more insecurities I needed to overcome before being able to parent her and my other two children well. The first obstacle was overcoming my own insecurities, and before getting to know my children, setting up a loving and safe environment for them to learn and grow.
What advice would you give other Fathers on their journey?
Brother, give yourself a break. You’re present, you care, and you’re doing your best. That’s worth celebrating! Continue to be authentic and connect with your children. Those consistent, simple moments will soon be the most impactful.
If you could write a quick letter to your father, starting with “Dear Father,” what would you say?
Dear Father,
Thank you for never giving up on me, even when I gave you every excuse to do so 
. I appreciate your patience, prayers, and persistence. I know it wasn’t easy, but I can say with confidence that your sacrifices yesterday led to my success today. You’re the best, and you have to live forever to continue to be my friend, guide, mentor, confidant, and personal chaplain (lol). I love you, man!
Your [favorite] and son who tested your patience and religion ,
Olaolu
