Name: Brandon Smith | City: Sacramento CA | IG: @Blayyyyze22
Take us through your thoughts the moment you realized your child was ready to come into this world.
I was working and my fiancé sent me a text saying she was in so much pain and it was at that moment I knew it was time for me to get up and get ready for the trip to the hospital. I had her hospital bag, my baby’s car seat and managed to have my 4 year old step daughter ready within 3 minutes. My step daughter was having trouble getting her shoes on and I picked her up and ran with her the bag and the seat all in my arms but I knew that I had to be strong for our family and I could not quit. The worst part was the 30 min separation period between me and my fiancé. I called my mother to pick up my step daughter and she was there immediately but the doctors would not let me see my fiancé until I took a COVID test and the COVID test had me fearful that I wouldn’t be able to see my child immediately or be there for my fiancé as she gave birth. I take the test and 10 painful minutes go by I was sweating after I took the text because some cases are A symptomatic which means you may not have the obvious signs of COVID but you may still have it and all of a sudden I hear the doctors say here is your wrist band to go see her. I ran and my fiancé was on the top floor I took the stairs to be sure that I could get there as fast as I can then I began to see my fiancé’s face light up as I was able to support her in giving birth to my first Child.
What were your physical, mental, and emotional feelings while in the delivery room as your child was entering the world.
I was told by so many people that I would pass out by how gruesome a birth could be. I did not pass out I watched the entire thing and gained even more love for my fiancé because she went through so much pain to give me a lifetime of joy. When my daughter was born our doctors gave us the opportunity to play music for delivery. My fiancé and I decided to play “Oceans” by Hillsong. This song has been our favorite song because of the lyrics and there was a part of the song that said “Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders let me walk upon the waters where ever you might call me” and I began to see my daughters head and the doctors said “Okay one more big push” and the tears began to fill my eyes as I watched my child enter the world I had so many fears and the all were gone as soon as I heard her cry for the first time. It was at that moment I realized I am all she has and I have to trust God in all situations and show my daughter how every man should treat her day in and day out.
Describe what it felt like holding your child for the first time?
When I held my child I realized that all of my fears of being a bad father or not having the financial resources to make this happen had all left. I also realized there was no one else more fit to be her father than me she is mine she has my blood she is apart of me into this world and no one else other than me is going to be able to guide her and that it was time for me to eliminate all excuses. The very moment I held her I noticed her hands were just like mine and her face was just like mine. I could not believe that God allowed me to see this day and in spite of any wrong that I’ve ever done. He gave me the best gift and trusted me to take care it and protect it with my life.
Do you have any advice for fathers who are expecting for the first time?
Don’t be afraid of what you might not be, just don’t be an absent father. When I was telling people I was expecting the common response that I got every time. “are you sure you can do this?” It wasn’t until the day that my daughter was born that I realized I can do this. It’s okay to be afraid but do not stay afraid. Be strong for your family there is strength in consistency.