Name: Haven Morris City: Chicago IL | @_misbeHAVEN
Dad’s Name: Aaron Morris Sr.
Describe your relationship with your Father and how did that impact you?
My relationship with my dad was warm and full of understanding. As I got older, we had our ups and downs, but our bond was warming when we were together. We would have deep talks about how we both reacted to a situation or about bumps we had to over come, and the conversation would always end with both of us understanding the other. We were able to connect and grow even if we disagreed with one another. That impacted me more when my dad passed away more than it did when he was alive. When he passed, and I really thought about our memories together, I started to realize that we were more alike than I’d like to admit. I started to see that us understanding each other, was really like understanding our own selves because we were so similar. We’d essentially be saying the same thing, but both being so stubborn and headstrong, we had to make it as if we were saying something different.
What’s the best thing you’ve learned from your Father?
The best thing I’ve learned from my dad is, “life goes on”. Through trials and tribulations my dad kept going. He kept living his life out how he wanted to. Another thing that I learned from my dad that is so important to me is how important family is. My dad was very adamant on having all 6 of his children together, and unfortunately, that moment didn’t happen with all 6 of us until he passed away. When I am with my siblings, I feel the presence of our dad. There were many times where without them, I’m not sure how I would’ve made it through the mourning of our father.
What struggles did you face in your relationship with your Dad and how did you get through them?
The struggles I faced in my relationship with my Dad was never wanting to disappoint him and then actually disappointing him. That may seem so vague, but there was a time where I reacted to a situation and within that I cut off communication with my dad. I didn’t know how to move forward after some time had passed. I felt like it was too late to rekindle our relationship, but we got through it by eventually communicating and laying out all of our feelings. I expressed so much to him that I hadn’t known I was holding in, and he did the same. We were able to move past it, and that’s what I loved about him so much – he was so loving, so forgiving.
What has your relationship with your Father taught you about what to look/not look for in your partner?
My relationship with my Father taught me better communication skills to have with my partner. It taught me to not hold in my feelings and to express my thoughts and intentions. When looking for a partner, I looked for someone who was family orientated, God-fearing, and hardworking. All of the things my dad embodied.
How has your relationship with your Father shaped the woman you are today?
My Father would emphasize many times the importance of independence. My relationship with him shaped the women I am today by allowing me to be more secure in myself and independent.
If you could write a short letter to your father, starting with “Dear Father,” what would you say?
I miss you so much! There are so many moments where I yearn for a hug from you, a text, or the sound of you rapping Future. Sometimes I think about what you would say about certain situations, and then I get sad because I want to hear your response and not me just making up what I think you’d say. Thank you Dad for one of the last conversations we had. It’s like you knew you were leaving us. That was probably the deepest conversation we had, and we’ve had some deep talks as I got older. You really understood me, and I am so grateful to have had many moments with you. I love you so much, and I miss you daddy.