Sebastian Yancy Says Being a Father is “Accepting the highest responsibility of my bloodline”

Name: Sebastian Yancy City: Waxahachie, TX | Instagram: @d.s.yancy

What does being a father mean to you?

Accepting the highest responsibility of my bloodline, legacy and give my children love to my greatest ability.
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Describe your experience with your father growing up and how that impacted you today.

I didn’t have a relationship with my father until I came to Dallas, TX in my mid twenties. My mother took care of me and my two siblings , Paul and Taylor alone. I didn’t hold any anger for him not being there,, because I just wasn’t that type of person and never held anything personal against anyone who didn’t aim to harm me. So my mother just taught me to be what she believed a man should be…respectful, kind but stern, loving, courageous and use my mind at all times. Given my father’s and I lack of relationship, it was nice when we got in touch and he told me to come visit so he could spend time with me. I was suppose to go to Canada at the time, because I was still competing as an Professional MMA Fighter. While in Texas, I learned how much we were alike, good and in ways that wasn’t bad but at times inactive in the form of loving. Now fast forward, being a father myself, the love that I have and care to be by my children’s side is such a reflex, I wonder how anyone could not want to do this. Being there for my children is my greatest achievement. But still, I hold no anger. God has a plan for us all, and everyone isn’t meant to be in every chapter of your life and you never know the extent of anyone’s life. And that’s life. I’m just going to make sure I’m there with my children as long as I’m alive.

What things did you take from your experience growing up into your own fatherhood journey?

That children will show you “YOU” in your most raw form. It sounds selfish, but through learning my children, I’ve inadvertently began to learn myself. Understanding it’s okay to father my way and setting boundaries on other family members. We sometimes almost allow the older generation to take on our responsibility to parent and or give us the tools because it’s possible, we are still a child or lesser than to them in our minds, but their time to lead has passed and it’s up to us to lead ours, even better than they led us.

Have you had any obstacles on your fatherhood journey? If so, explain.

One of my biggest obstacles was staying with the in laws for the 1st year of our first born child. It was also during covid season and or lockdown. My wife’s parents were kind to me at a level that any son in law would wish for. But living within a home that is not your own does not bring comfort. It keeps you almost in a place of feeling like an outsider no matter the level of kindness. So being there and trying to learn what way of fathering I felt comfortable establishing was extremely challenging due to our different up bringings. To make matters worst, my brother had passed away, people were not being able to leave the homes, manditory masks, George Floyd’s death, and the tensions from the presidential elections just left me emotionally drained and occasionally balling in their garage when no one was around. I encountered more emotional struggles than I believe I ever had in that 1 year of my life and no one knew. Some of those topics above did pave the way for discussions that I feel brought me and wife’s parents closer, and for that I’m glad. I would be remiss if I didn’t mention how helpful it also was to have them there on the nights that sleep didn’t seem possible though! It took lots of strength to maintain a version of peace that was acceptable to the society of loving people around me. But those moments are when the heart of our truth is tested, and even though I still battle with a few things, I am much stronger.

What advice would you give others new on their fatherhood journey?

Understand that you are creating the man your son invisions himself to become, and the man your daughter will go find. How you respond to things, love, laugh and so much more will be gathered and collected as information for what will be comfortable for them. Clear out any ways that you have that aren’t loving, or else they will be fighting your fights on top of the ones this world will already ready have for them. Be strong in your decision making and make decisions! Don’t over obsess if they will dislike you for disciplining them. Do it anyway. No matter how hard. And feed them knowledge so they can walk through any door, not so they end up hateful and lose opportunities. Most importantly, teach them their God and their love. You won’t always be there, and if they know God, love, themselves…they will never be alone.

If you could write a quick letter to your father, starting with “Dear Father,” what would you say?

Dear Father, Thank you for coming back into my life. Our time together was helpful and pivotal to my families future. You letting me come to Texas, allowed me to find a wife who loves me, to children that inspire me and publishing my first fictional novel based off of them. A career at the #1 Ranked MMA Gym Fortis MMA and most importantly, convinced my mother, sister, brother and everyone else in my immediate family to move to a better environment as well. Thank you Dad. God places us with whom we are suppose to be with when he feels it’s right. Constantly humbling us all. And in this moment, knowing that God put it on your heart to allow me to come visit, knowing we don’t speak much now sometimes hurts. But I don’t hold any ill will because his plan is bigger than ours and now it’s my turn to father. Love you so much Dad.

List 5 fathers you cosign. (Add their IG names)

Chris Jones @lionheart903 Allen Lyles @boogiedownlyles Ryan Span @superman_spann Charles Byrd @dynamitebyrdmma Sayif Saud @sayifsaud

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