Jibri Perry Says “Words can’t describe fatherhood”

Name: Jibri Perry City: San Antonio TX | Instagram: @Jibri.Perry

What does being a father mean to you?

Words can’t describe fatherhood. I feel like my purpose has been fulfilled with becoming a father. I take this assignment (from God) very seriously. Have I always been perfect? Not at all. But I recognize my weaknesses and work very hard to overcome them. Being a father allows you to see the holes in your life and allows you every opportunity to correct the flawed person you are to ensure your kids don’t make your mistakes or have your same blind spots. There’s nothing better than being a father.
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Describe your experience with your father growing up and how that impacted you today.

My father wasn’t a consistently present figure in my life and unfortunately died at an early age. I knew he loved me, but because love is a verb, it was hard for me as a child to understand why there was no action behind his words. I resented my father for a long time. His effect on myself and younger sisters caused ripple effects that are still probably unveiling themselves. But I’d like to believe in growing up and understanding the journey of life, I can see how he may have had good intentions, yet horrible results.

What things did you take from your experience growing up into your own fatherhood journey?

I believe my father showed me the blueprint on what not to be as a father. Unfortunately, I’m sure that wasn’t his goal when initially knowing he’d be a father, but that’s what happened. He showed me what not to do and those same emotions I felt, I would have been more at fault if I allowed my daughters to experience some of the same things. So for me, being intentional about my responsibility as a father has been my number one priority.

Have you had any obstacles on your fatherhood journey?

Of course. I spent 23 years in the military and was away from my daughters a lot unfortunately. So, We all fall short of excellence and that definitely includes me. I have made decisions, that in the moment seemed amazing. However, that same decision turned out to be terrible. But you can’t allow those moments to define you. As a father, kids just want your time and attention, and they want (without being able to express it other than acting out) a consistent presence. They don’t care if you had a bad day, made a horrible decision, or whatever. They just want to know, will you be there the next time.

What advice would you give others new on their fatherhood journey?

Understand the magnitude of what this means. You are responsible for another person. That young person will look to you for everything. They don’t require much… only that you be there. What you lack in experience, I guarantee you will make up for in love. Strive to do and be a better man and father. Do it for yourself and in turn, you will learn that it goes hand in hand with being a better father. Speak positive affirmations in their lives… pray for them… love on them. They need you and you need them.

If you could write a quick letter to your father, starting with “Dear Father,” what would you say?

Dear father… I forgive you. I know you tried your best but I couldn’t understand that when I was younger. Now that I’m a father, I understand how easily our paths could have had similar outcomes. Thank you for trying and thank you for unknowingly showing me the correct path not to take. I don’t blame you and I pray that we meet again. I love you.

 

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