Rell Holman says “being someone my child can believe in is important”

Name: Rell Holman | City: Fort Wayne, IN | IG: @Btu_rell

What does being a father mean to you?

A father to me means a lot of things. The protector, provider, teacher, the one who discipline. Being able to create that balanced bond between friends/parent. Someone my child can believe in and know everything will be alright. Providing guidance & being a role model.

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Describe your experience with your father growing up and how that impacted you today.

My experience with my father is that he was there but he wasn’t present. I grew up in a single mother home and didn’t see my dad until I was about 5-6. It impacted me in a way that made me feel it wasn’t someone I could rely on in troubling times or someone to talk to.

What things did you take from your experience growing up into your own fatherhood journey?

Made me want to be in my baby life every single day no matter what. He also taught that you don’t have to discipline in the traditional way. I feel my voice and my demeanor is strong enough of a presence. Also not all things she does is the end of the world or means she’s going to be bad. She’s just curious and figuring out life the way she knows how. So if she spills something I’ll teach her to clean it and how not to spill it.

Have you had any obstacles on your fatherhood journey?

Yes. With the mother. I won’t go too deep but I’m sure the fathers who are not with the mother understand.

What advice would you give others new on their fatherhood journey?

1.) Please be present. 2.) Do what you say. You word is everything. 3.) Look at everything as a lesson. You can’t teach a baby how to be a baby but a baby will teach you how to be a father. ??

If you could write a quick letter to your father, starting with “Dear Father,” what would you say?

Dear Father, I mean no harm, I have no ill feelings towards you. I know our relationship is way better than it used to be. I know you weren’t ready to be a father when I was born. You had to learn as you grew. I now understand why I am the way I am. For that I thank you. ?? #Love

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