Name: Justin Spears | City: St. Louis MO | IG: @Akings_life
What does being a father mean to you?
It literally means the world. I grew up without a father, so I wanted to make sure I gave my daughter and any future children all the love and support I never received from my father. I wanted to be present most of all.
Describe your experience with your father growing up and how that impacted you today.
As I touched on before I really have no experiences with my father. In a way it made fatherhood for me much easier. All I had to do was give my daughter everything I didn’t have. Basically be the opposite of what my father was to me. I knew how I felt growing up and I never wanted my daughter to feel that hurt.
What things did you take from your experience growing up into your own fatherhood journey?
The most important thing that I flipped from my experiences growing up without a father was to be present. Going to soccer games, being there at bedtime, reassuring her that she’s safe and secure. These are the things that I didn’t experience so it made me want to be my daughters biggest cheerleader and most feared protector.
Have you had any obstacles on your fatherhood journey?
The biggest obstacle I have had was my career. I was in the military and actually missed my daughter being born due to being in Afghan. I decided to give up my career that was well over 10 years because I was in a situation where I was going to have to move away from her. I couldn’t do that to her so I left the military left my career and started all over to make sure I was here for her.
What advice would you give others new on their fatherhood journey?
Just be active in your child’s life. It will be the most rewarding thing for not only the child but for you as well.
If you could write a quick letter to your father, starting with “Dear Father,” what would you say?
It would say first and foremost I forgive you for not being there for me. I don’t know the circumstances of your absence but turns out it made me a better man and father. You not only missed out on a son to be proud of but a granddaughter that is truly special.
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